7 Ways To Bond With Your Partner After Your Baby’s Birth
Life changes after having a baby — it’s inevitable. Parenting may change you as a person and affect your and your partner’s relationship. But relax! Instead of dreading change or the “end of romance”, acknowledge and prepare for this 180-degree turn. Consider sitting down and discussing the expectations both you and your partner have, and come up with a brief plan to support your relationship during this hectic period.
If you are looking for ideas, here are 7 different ways to bond with your partner after the baby’s arrival:
Make time for each other
Creating a space for your relationship after your baby’s arrival is challenging.
Sleep deprivation, different schedules, and lack of time are obstacles to spending time together. It’s also natural to focus on bonding with your baby, which means there is less time for intimacy with your other half. This could make one of you, or both, feel lonely and distant.
Allocate some time now and then to be together. For example, schedule a date night at least once a week. Or, if this is impossible, consider taking just a few minutes for each other in the morning and evening, or whenever the baby is asleep. Check in with them, ask how they’re feeling, or simply cuddle up together on the sofa for some TV.
Be there for each other
Although the first few weeks after birth are mainly spent at home, you and your partner are busier than ever. You may not have time for yourself, let alone them. But during this time, you need each other more than ever. The truth is, adapting to a baby in the house can be tough, especially if you had many kid-free years with your partner. Luckily, you aren’t going through this alone!
Be sure to check in with each other regularly. Ask them how they’re coping with parenthood. Listen to them. Be patient and kind. In return, explain exactly how you are feeling. Granted, you may not have the time for in-depth conversations on a daily basis. But a couple of times a week, check in with them. Perhaps just before you go to sleep at night?
Use your senses
If spending a few hours together is not an option for you, try bonding through small gestures during the day. Making eye contact with your partner regularly, a gentle touch or a quick kiss to simply acknowledge your partner makes the world of a difference.
This brief physical connection reminds you that you are there for each other even if you are busy with other tasks. It’s a silent way to say “I see you, I love you, even though I am exhausted and can’t give you more time right now”.
Show appreciation
For some couples, a few encouraging words can help to strengthen the connection and feel each other’s presence and support. Compliment how well they are adapting to being a parent and how much you appreciate them. A few simple words can really brighten their day and make them smile.
Not good at expressing yourself out loud? Or, do your conflicting schedules leave you no time for sharing your feelings? Leave romantic sticky notes of appreciation for your other half. Or drop them a spontaneous text expressing how much you love them and perhaps even miss them. Such messages are bound to make you feel closer, even if they aren’t with you.
Share responsibilities
This way to bond is rather practical. But it can still help you connect with your significant other and make them feel appreciated and vice versa. This can be your partner putting the baby to sleep, while you take a shower and unwind a little bit. Or, they can cook a meal for you, while you are breastfeeding.
It can also be the other way around! If your partner spends a lot of time with the baby, you can do chores, cook dinner and do the dishes, or take a trip to buy some groceries. Such acts of service make some people feel more valued and supported, which creates more space for intimacy.
Spend time together as a family
You can still bond with your partner even when you’re actively in parent mode. Spend time together as a family with your new baby and other kids if you have them. This is a great way to bond as you get to see a new side of your partner, the parent side.
Plan some mini adventures outside the house, like taking the baby out for a stroll in the park. As they get older, you can take them to the zoo or ball pit. And anywhere else you get to have some kiddie fun and connect with your partner while parenting.
Relaxation techniques
Another option is to schedule ‘relaxation’ with your partner. There are many relaxation techniques out there from meditation to yoga, mindful breathing, visualization, and more. Choose whichever works best for you and practice it once a day without taking too much of your time.
Beginning’s audio sessions feature a combination of relaxation techniques and natural sounds to help you unwind in just a few minutes. Simply open the app, go to the “journeys” section at the bottom of the main menu, and prepare to feel positively recharged.
It’s important to remember that, regardless of the difficulties, your relationship also needs nurturing. But it does not necessarily mean you have to dedicate a lot of time to your partner, as you did before your baby’s birth. Small acts of kindness, date nights, and relaxation practices will do. And remember not to worry if it isn’t always working out! It takes a while to adapt to new routines and establish a routine that helps you both while also taking care of your little one.
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